Why has no one put me on with the Equalizer? You guys ain’t loyal!? This movie is so good. Went and saw The Equalizer 2 with my best friend yesterday and just got the Denzel jitters. That is one acting man. Gotta love a talented black man with such a positive mindset. He has given very impactful speeches at graduations and can seem to motivate anyone.
I can’t do that. I just can’t. Me… speak to groups of people on a stage… nah. I haven’t finished anything. College degree box is never checked, just “some college”. I haven’t lost all of this weight I’ve been carrying since Virginia Tech plotted on my downfall with all those dag on dining halls. I haven’t fully come out of my box that fears embarrassment and being put on the spot. I hate being the center of attention, but since I hate it, I know God is going to use me in an area where I have to be the center of attention from time-to-time. He knows me! He knows what makes me uncomfortable and what makes my shy side come out in full effect to be seen. However, he still is using me.
Who made the rules that if you weren’t to a specific spot yet, that you aren’t worthy? God didn’t so don’t you put that on him! Lol Not my Daddy! So where did this all stem from? I’m too sleepy to get super deep tonight, but just know that we are too dope to be controlled by man-made rules. So what you haven’t finished college yet KRYSTAL… you are in school currently and have more goals than you have ever had. If you would have continued at Virginia Tech majoring in engineering, what would you have done with it? God is giving us experience so if it’s in your will to receive the degree, you will be able to utilize it for the purpose he has for you, not the purpose you made for yourself. You feel like your will is greater than the one God made for you? Yassss…that was deep right? lol
Stop limiting yourself from applying for jobs or partaking in activities that you feel you aren’t qualified enough to involve yourself in. Stop that. Woman/man you are amazing! God lives in you! You are loved whether it has resonated or not. Self-love means that you must know and love yourself first. If you don’t think you are good enough, how will a supervisor, crush, or stranger believe that you are? I am not telling you to apply to neurosurgeon positions and you can barely get through biology. Honey… sometimes that tree just doesn’t need to be climbed lol. Climb that cherry tree right over thurr! But baby, you have to set your expectations for yourself higher. Put yourself out there and see how God can use you.
I honestly think sometimes that I am not worthy of wanting to be in marketing or tech, or anything that just makes me second guess my talent. I went to auditions with a friend to help him with his series he is producing and had written. I ended up having to read for a character who is honestly a bit of a thotty bot. Lol However, I was shaking and nervous even though I wasn’t up for the part, I just want to always be amazing. If I’m not amazing, I am just a hot, stank mess. After running over it twice, I had people telling me that I should do this and be apart of the project. I always feel like people are gassing me up with 93. Like, be real with me! However, people were. I took the part because the director was so cool and it’s not in my comfort zone. Ya girl acting now, aahhhhowww (cardio b noises are hard to spell).
Be you, you’re pretty awesome.
Love God, Love yourself,